Alexis
Pagomenos
Psychology
Social Anxiety Therapy
in Brisbane
Do You Feel Like You Can't Be Yourself Around Other People?
Do you find yourself overthinking, second-guessing yourself, or holding back in social situations?
Perhaps you wish you could feel more comfortable around others, speak your mind and enjoy social interactions without constantly worrying about what people think.
You might recognise some of these experiences:
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Replaying conversations in your head, wondering if you said something awkward or made a bad impression.
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Feeling anxious before social events, mentally preparing what to say or worrying about how things might go.
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Going quiet in groups, holding back your opinions or struggling to join conversations.
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Avoiding certain social situations because you worry about being judged, embarrassed or not knowing what to say.
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Comparing yourself to others and feeling frustrated that you can't seem to relax and be yourself.
You might look confident on the outside, but internally feel like you're constantly monitoring yourself, worrying about what others think, and trying to get things right.
What Does Living with Social Anxiety Feel Like?
Social anxiety can make everyday interactions feel much harder than they need to be. You might spend hours thinking about an upcoming event, worrying about who will be there, what you'll say and how you'll come across. When you're actually there, you might feel self-conscious, struggle to think clearly or find yourself staying quiet rather than joining in.
Even after a social interaction has finished, your mind might keep going. You replay conversations, pick apart things you said and wonder whether other people noticed how anxious you felt. Over time, this can become exhausting and leave you feeling disconnected from others and frustrated that you're not living the life you want.
You're Not Alone in This
Social anxiety is more common than you might think. Many people experience the fear of being judged, saying the wrong thing or not fitting in. However, just because it's common doesn't mean you have to keep struggling with it.
It can be particularly difficult when the people around you don't understand what's going on beneath the surface.
You might feel like you're the only one finding social situations so difficult, or wonder why something that seems so easy for others feels so challenging for you.
You don't have to figure it out on your own.
Feeling More Comfortable Being Yourself Around Others Is Possible
Social anxiety can feel like something that's just part of who you are. You might have spent years worrying about what other people think, avoiding situations that make you uncomfortable or trying to manage your anxiety by preparing, rehearsing and getting everything right.
The problem is that these strategies can sometimes keep social anxiety going. Avoiding situations might bring temporary relief, but it doesn't give you the opportunity to discover that you can manage uncomfortable feelings and still participate. Similarly, constantly monitoring yourself or seeking reassurance can make social interactions feel even more stressful.
The good news is that you can learn to respond differently to anxiety.
I work with young adults in their 20's and 30's who want to feel more comfortable in social situations and stop letting anxiety dictate what they do. Having worked with over 200 clients with social anxiety, and having learned to respond differently to it myself personally, I understand how frustrating and isolating these experiences can be.
Therapy can help you understand what's keeping you stuck, develop new ways of responding to anxiety and gradually build confidence in situations that currently feel difficult.
The goal isn't to become someone you're not or never experience anxiety again (because everyone feels social anxiety from time to time, even me!).
It's to feel more comfortable being yourself, participating with others and feeling a sense of connection and belonging, even when anxiety shows up.
What Will Therapy for Social Anxiety look like?
Starting therapy can feel like a big step, especially if you're already worried about being judged or saying the wrong thing.
My aim is to create a space where we can normalise our insecurities, our unhelpful behaviours, and our negative, critical or embarrassing beliefs about ourselves without any judgement or blame.
So that you can understand what is keeping you stuck, and use evidence-based strategies and professional support to help you work to change it.
In our first session, we'll spend time understanding what brings you to therapy, how social anxiety affects your life and what you'd like to be different. There's no expectation that you need to explain everything perfectly. We'll work it out together.
Then we'll explore the thoughts, feelings and behaviours that might be keeping your social anxiety going. This might include avoiding social situations, overthinking conversations, negative or critical beliefs about yourself, seeking reassurance or constantly monitoring how you're coming across.
Next we'll work on practical strategies to respond differently to social anxiety, to help you change your relationship with anxious thoughts and feelings, rather than constantly trying to control or get rid of them. Depending on your needs, this may include gradually facing situations you've been avoiding (at your pace, when you feel ready).
Progress might look like speaking up in a group, expressing your opinions, going to social events without spending days worrying beforehand, or being able to enjoy a conversation without constantly analysing yourself.
I work to tailor therapy to you, your experiences, and the changes you want to make. We'll work at a pace that feels manageable to you, while helping you move towards the life you want to live.
You May Have Some Concerns. That's Okay.
What if I'm too anxious to talk in therapy?
That's completely okay. You don't need to be confident or know exactly what to say. We can take things at your pace, and you don't need to perform or impress me. Therapy is a space where you can practise being yourself, and slowly drop any feelings of embarrassment about these normal human emotions and experiences.
What if I've always been like this?
You might have experienced social anxiety for years and feel like it's just part of your personality. However, the way you respond to anxiety can change. You can learn new ways of responding to anxious thoughts and feelings in social situations, and with practice build confidence being yourself in social situations over time.
What if I don't know whether therapy will help me?
It's understandable to feel unsure. This is one of the reasons I encourage people to reach out to our amazing reception team. They have a wealth of knowledge about therapy, and it's a great opportunity to talk briefly about what you're experiencing, ask questions, and get a better understanding of what therapy might look like.
Do I have to commit to ongoing therapy after reaching out?
Not at all! There's absolutely no pressure to book a session afterwards. Reaching out to our reception team is simply an opportunity for you to see whether we might be a good fit, and for you to understand how therapy could help.
How do I take the next step?
If you're tired of overthinking, holding yourself back, or feeling like you can't quite be yourself around other people, therapy could be a helpful next step.
You don't need to wait until things become overwhelming to reach out. I'd love to hear about what you've been experiencing and talk with you about what working together might look like.
Contact us today. There's no pressure or obligation to book a therapy session afterwards.
Get In Touch
Ready to take the next step? I am ready when you are.
Contact Information
I work as part of the team at My Psych Clinic, in Eight Mile Plains.
Get in touch with our friendly reception team to book a session or answer any questions.
Level 1 Building 10/107 Miles Platting Rd, Eight Mile Plains QLD 4113
Please note that I am unable to respond to emergency or crisis situations. If you, or someone else, requires immediate emergency support, please contact emergency services on 000, Lifeline (24 hr service) on 13 11 14, Mental Health Access Line (24 hr service) on 1300 64 22 55, 13YARN - 13 92 76, or visit your nearest hospital emergency department.
